This Is Not a Song

This link is not significant. Why would it be?
http://youtu.be/s4LJIt8Avyg

A Flash of Pink

Once upon a time, there was a parrot.
The parrot had a normal life, living life as a parrot would.
The parrot repeated what was heard and saw nothing wrong with it.
Then, there was a mockingbird, who sang glorious melodies as it flew across the skies outside.
The parrot, having lived all its life in a cage, was captivated by the mockingbird.
It thought to itself, "How great life would be outside these bars!"
The parrot imitated the mockingbird, in hopes of one day being just as free.
It sang. It sang again and again. It forgot how to speak, but it could sing.
No one understood it anymore, but the parrot didn't mind.
One day, the parrot escaped the cage, finally to enjoy the freedom.
It flew out the window, out into the open, towards the sky.
It thought it could fly over the clouds and marvel at the newly discovered world.

But no one understood Edna anymore.
Not even Robert, whom she thought shared the same thoughts.

It remembered the time it saw the mockingbird. How amazing it thought it would have been.
Instead, now it saw a pigeon with broken wings, fluttering, and ultimately falling into the sea.
It was a tough world out there for a parrot.
No one understood it.

Edna thought swimming out where "no woman had ever swum before" would mean freedom. And in the end, she does exactly that. She swims and swims. Far out.
This time, she's not coming back. She's not afraid.
Edna once said that she would sacrifice her life, but not herself, for her children. She fulfils this by committing suicide, while retaining her beliefs.
Edna failed to overcome the oppresion, the prejudice.
So she goes to the beach, where it all started.
She sees "a bird with a broken wing" falling into the water.
She goes into the water, never to come back out.


The parrot could not swim, but everything was alright. It could sing.
So it sang. No one would understand it, but it didn't care anymore.
Perhaps some bird could understand it, but "it was too late; the shore was far behind [it], and [its] strenth was gone.
It sang as the currents took over its body.
It sang while the waves dragged it under.
It sang until the water ran into its lungs.
A flash of pink.
Then nothing.

Nothing for the parrot at least.
Life goes on.

In death, Edna was truly free, but could no longer be understood.
If so, was death a form of waking up, or going back to sleep?

Well, life goes on.
Speaking of life, when the alarm clock rings tomorrow, do I wake up or go back to sleep?

Constant Change

Wake up. Go to sleep. Wake up. Go to sleep.
Perhaps I need a change in my life as well.

Where is the Love?

I had to make a random YouTube account just to upload this.
I cut out all the gaps for your convenience (and that's why it's so short).
You're welcome.

Just Keep Swimming ♬

"She wanted to swim far out, where no woman had swum before," and that is exactly what Edna does. Realizing how 'easy' it is, she goes more and more away from shore, until she is suddenly struck by the fear that she might have come too far and that she might not have the strength to make it back. But she makes it anyways.

The moment of truth.

Edna has finally become 'independent', separate from the social constraints put on her. This moment of swimming far out symbolizes her freedom and shows her confidence in her newfound self-awareness. However, the fear that something might go wrong is still present, and Edna might not have had the full realization yet.

The effects of this recent awakening can be seen a bit later, at night, when Mr. Pontellier asks Edna to come in. Edna downright refuses. She states that at any other time, "she would have gone in at his request. She would, through habit, have yielded to his desire; not with any sense of submission or obedience to his compelling wishes, but unthinkingly, as we walk, move, sit, stand, go through the saily treadmill of the life which has been portioned out to [women]." This irritates Mr. Pontellier, who continuously asks Edna to come in and is refused every time. Edna makes herself clear, saying that she will not answer him back if she is talked to in a commanding way again. Later, when Edna cannot hold back the sleep any longer, she goes in and asks Mr. Pontellier to come in, and he replies that he will, after finishing his cigar.

This scene not only shows a different, transformed Edna from before, but it also indicates that Mr. Pontellier cannot really do anything about it. In the end, however, Edna goes to sleep, and when she asks Mr. Pontellier whether he will come in, he says he will, later. This implies that Edna doesn't have the choice of going to bed at the time she wants to, while Mr. Pontellier does.

Although the oppresion continues, the change has begun.


Change.

Speaking of change, I shall be calling Mr. Pontellier by the name 'Leonce' from now and on. Mr. Pontellier is way too long. And formal.

AIWBB

Solitude

Oh, I know that song!
It's that song that reminds me of that naked, hopeless, resigned man on the beach. What was the song called again? It's at the tip of my tongue... Oh, yes! Solitude. That's it.
So that's what this Mademoiselle Reisz is going to play, huh? Hope it's not a crappy remix.

...and so, Edna starts listening to the song, expecting the usual pictures to pop up in her mind... But they don't.

She didn't see anything. No pictures of solitude, of hope, of longing, or of despair.
Instead, she FEELS these.

Edna bursts into tears, and she just can't stop crying. Why? Why this time and not any time else? What's so different? What has changed?

First of all, her reactions are getting more and more violent. It went from doubt to weeping to just downright crying in the middle of a piano performance. This shows how Edna is further 'waking up'. The more she sees the truth, the harsher she realizes it is.

Until now, 'Solitude' had given her a picture. Nothing more. Now, instead of simply perceiving the solitude, she feels it. Despite being in a marriage, she realizes how alone she actually is, under the oppression, not seen as much more than your average useful-for-just-a-couple-of-things human being.

Madamoiselle Reisz, after finishing her performance, comes up to Edna and tells her that she was the only one there worth playing for. Reisz seems to understand Edna, and I have my own doubts as to whether this scene might be foreshadowing something.

Before, Edna would link 'solitude' with a man. Would her view of solitude have changed after the performance? Perhaps now it is a woman staring out into the horizon, looking at the ever-so-free bird, flying across the sky as the sun begins to rise...

Me First? Hell No!

*RING* Do I want to wake up?
It's 5:00. I can sleep more.

*RING* Wha- It's only been 30 seconds! Chill down, alarm clock.
It's 5:10. A lot of time left.

*RING* Ugh... Five minutes more...
5:20. Should start waking up.

*RING* What time is it?
5:30. I can probably rush everything up later... I need more sleep.

...

Yawn... What time is it?
7:08. Oh what do you know. Negative three minutes to get to class. No biggie. Nothing wrong.
DAMN IT.

One tends to realize some things a bit too late. The fact that you need to wake up, for one, is something that I, and hopefully many others, struggle with every morning.

Got a bit off topic.

Now, why haven't the women in The Awakening realized that something was wrong? I mean, other than Edna, someone must have seen this! There are so many women in the same situation, so isn't it basically impossible for this oppresion to go on for so long?

Well, there's your problem. All the women were in the same situation.
If everyone else is sleeping and you wake up in the middle of the night and you're sleepy as shi[giraffe], you're not going to wake up. Why wake up when everyone else is sleeping? Just do what others do, and you'll be fine. If something goes wrong, everyone goes wrong, but there's no way in hell I'm the only one getting in trouble, nu-uh.


This is why there is no one-man revolutions. You need people with a common cause. Who would want to be the first woman to go against the common norm and risk being remembered as 'that-one-woman-that-went-batshi[giraffe]-crazy-and-had-to-be-taken-to-that-white-house-at-the-top-of-the-hill'?

Why would one want to swim farther out into the sea, where no one had ever been to? Who knows what you'll find there. It could be treasure, yes, but it could be death. (or worse, a shark... followed by death.)

Now, would you say that this 'awakening' was a bit too late?
After all, all this sexism and stuff is still a big topic nowadays, more than a century after this book was written. Personally, that's something to think about.

May the Awakening Commence

It seems the awakening has begun.

Edna begins to "realize her position in the universe as a human being, and to recognize her relations as an individual to the world within and about her."

Edna might not show it physically, but it seems there's a lot going in her mind. The detail in which the author describes all the emotions and thoughts passing through Edna's mind is pretty impressive, and it's almost as if I'm being awoken myself. (This did not prevent me from being sleepy though...)

Noticing Edna's thoughtful silence, Adele, Edna's friend, asks Edna what she is thinking. Edna tells her many things. At this moment, more and even more thoughts find their way into Edna's mind, questioning and searching for answers.


Let's stop and do some math/logic.
Edna = Parrot.
Parrot talks in English, French, Spanish, and a language that nobody understood except for the mocking-bird at the other side of the door.
There is something about Edna that only she and the 'mocking-bird' seem to understand.
This 'mocking-bird' would be someone who truly understands Edna's inner thoughts, one who might possibly be 'awakened'.

This moment made me think: Could Adele be the 'mocking-bird'?
(This makes sense too, as Adele sings and nobody understands her lyrics. *ba-dum-tss*)



Sorry. *clears throat*
Anyways, does she understand Edna? (She did gently caress Edna's hand, you know.)

Now that the awakening has begun and Edna is seeing many things she did not see before, Kate Chopin once again drives us closer to the point she wants us to realize.

Trapped

Welcome back.

As a continuation from last time, let us go further in terms of The Awakening.

Remember last time I said something about female oppression back then? How I said that it was pretty normal for the woman? If you didn't remember, well, there it is.

Kate Chopin made it quite obvious too, but now, it is a bit more obvious-er. Yes, it's that redundant (and wrong).

Eventually, a part comes when Edna (the wife) is hanging out with all her friends, and everyone, including Edna, declare that "Mr. Pontellier was the best husband in the world."

Well, it is true that Mr. Pontellier does seem to love Edna, but as mentioned in the previous text, it is more like a love towards a valuable piece of private property. She is seen as a person, but to a certain extent, somewhat 'less' of a person.

But he doesn't seem too bad, does he? I mean, he might act like that, but probably in the inside, he loves her very much and is completely satisfied about having Edna as his wife. (Plus, he sends her chocolate. That must be a sign of happiness and love!)

Haha. Just kidding.

The chapter that comes directly afterwards states: "It would have been a difficult matter for Mr. Pontellier to define to his own satisfaction or any one else's wherein his wife failed in her duty toward their children. It was something which he felt rather than perceived, and he never voiced the feeling without subsequent regret and ample atonement."

Not the happiest husband if you ask me.

It's pretty clear at this point that sexual/social constraints is a (or the) main topic of the book. It's the story of a woman trapped in a cage called 'marriage'.

Speaking of cages, let us rewind.

*REWINDING*

The book starts with the mention of a caged parrot. The parrot says "Allez vous-en! Allez vous-en! Sapristi! That's all right!"

At first, I just read over that and said "no big deal," but then I decided to translate that...
...and I had an epiphany.

"Go away! Go away! Good heavens! That's all right!"

Remember how I said this book is the story of a woman trapped in a cage called 'marriage'?
Oooh. The parrot happens to be trapped in a cage too.
What do you know? The parrot represents Edna.
I think.

If this is so, then there might be a character that represents "the mocking-bird that hung on the other side of the door." Interesting.

Also, I wonder whom the 'parrot' is addressing when it screams out all those things. Men? Life?

We'll find out soon.
Hopefully.

Waking Up

It's been a loooooong sleep.
Time for the blog to wake up.

Speaking of waking up, I am reading The Awakening by Kate Chopin.
First of all, let me mention how not-weird it is for an Asian teenage boy to be carrying a pink book in his bag at all times. Yes, the book is pink. VERY pink.

Oh, yes. HOT.

Alright! Let's start reading.

The book starts with the mention of a parrot and an introduction to a man, Mr. Pontellier. This guy seems to be your average 19th century sexism-is-fine-because-women-are-inferior guy. He scolds his wife for having been out in the sun for too long.

Woah, woah, woah. Since when was tanning a bad thing? When was this book written?
*checks*
1899. Ohh. Okay.

"Huh. That's a funny-lookin' kitchen." -Mr. Pontellier

The text goes on to state that Mr. Pontellier looked at her wife, Edna, as if she were "a valuable piece of personal property which has suffered some damage".
Wow. That's... harsh.

If the sexual oppresion wasn't clear enough, Chopin clearly tries to make it explicit.
I'm guessing this is a femenist work, and maybe this has something to do with all the pink.
Another thing that seems slightly "off" is the fact that Edna doesn't really mind this. It's all normal. Her life just goes on, as she happily offers an umbrella and laughs.

Today, putting 'woman' and 'personal property' in the same sentence could possibly get you sued. Women wouldn't laugh at that (and would definitely not offer you an umbrella).

Anyways, the book only just started.
Let's prepare ourselves for the core of the apple, shall we?

Did I mention it will probably be thrown away?